Seriously, how many lists about hot vampires have you seen lately? Seems like everyone is jumping on the fangwagon. And why not, since vampires are obviously the new boy bands.
Although unlike boy bands there is a vampire for every sort of girl out there. If Edward Cullen isn't your thing, then you're probably watching True Blood instead. Ever since Bram Stoker rewrote some eastern European fairy-tales girls have fancied fangs.
Who couldn't resist all the brooding and the danger and the eternal love? If you happened to have missed out on the whole phenomenon, here's a short guide to which vampireboy might suit you.
Edward Cullen (do I really need to say it... Twilight)
Who hasn't heard about Edward? The sappiest vampire of them all. He's an easy one to figure out, if you're under sixteen you will probably like him. He's doing all those things that your first boyfriend will never do (and hopefully the next ones wont either); he breaks into your room and watches you sleep, he stalks you, he says he'll never stop loving you and he's constantly afraid he might hurt you because he loves you too much.
If you think that's true love and not psychotic possessiveness you will like Edward. You're probably a bit innocent and an aspiring emo who just wants someone to save you from all the annoying people around you. You feel like no one really gets you and Sylvia Plath is your heroine. It's ok, we've all been there. In a couple of years you'll forget all about Edward and start fancying equally sappy vampires that just have more hot sex.
The equally sappy vampire is Bill Compton in True Blood. He's the thinking girl's Edward Cullen, more mature, definitely better in bed and not a complete stalker. Actually it's probably Sookie Stackhouse who wears the pants in that relationship.
If you like your men fanged, but otherwise meek, obedient and a bit confused about their place in the world, then Bill Compton is your guy. He's fancied by the bored, the housewives and by those who haven't yet seen the episodes with vampire Eric.
Dracula (Bram Stoker's Dracula)
Oooh, this is a classic one, you're a bit of a non-conformist aren't you? Gary Oldman is probably one of your favourite actors and you silently snivel yourself to sleep every night because Sirius Black is no more. Then again you probably wouldn't because you like the darker things in life and Bellatrix Lestrange is your one and only role model.
If you're going for the original stuff; the old, rich and evil, then you probably like that velvet cape in your closet and wear long black skirts. You're also thirty-something and listen to Clan of Xymox and remember those good old days in the late 80s when you used to go to goth clubs.
Does anyone really fancy Angel anymore? Like Bill in True Blood his brooding, mysterious, tall, dark and handsome-routine got boring after a while. He's not a true bad boy and when he's evil, he's just evil (which is totally different from sexy-evil).
All it takes is one sexy blond vamp to make the whole undying, candle-lit, your cross is burning my chest while we kiss, but I don't care because I love you seem a bit boring and mundane. If you like Angel then you need to get out of your room and live a little.
However if Spike is your vampire of choice you're a pretty sensible girl. You like having fun and you don't take your vampires too seriously. That whole undying, eternal, ouch-my-heart sort of love, isn't really your thing. You're more into flirting and you probably have commitment issues. Just remember, not every bad boy out there will try to get their soul back for you.
Image via Usonian.